Yet Another Interview

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I've discovered an amazing fact: 3.2 beer is more than adequate to power this blog! I am now beginning my sixth 3.2 Natural Light and am buzzing my brains out! Where was I? Ah yes: investigating the beneficial aspects of circumcision. God has admitted that His 'contract' with the Chosen People was designed to limit their sexual pleasure to some extent. And near the end of the interview I sensed that god's last remark was a good point to end the encounter, so I did.

But I had some unanswered questions. I didn't want to bother god again so soon, therefore I resorted to conjuring up another interview with Lucifer:

me: I trust you have reviewed my voice recording of the 'god interview?'
lucifer: I have.
me: What do you make of it?
lucifer: God is being unusually honest. I think he likes you.
me: Really!?
lucifer: That is my impression.
me: Is that good or bad?
lucifer: Bad.
me: Why so? Why is that bad?
lucifer: There is a small chance you will end up in Heaven. That's bad.
me: Please explain.
lucifer: You wouldn't like it in Heaven.
me: Why not?
lucifer: Do you like Latin?
me: Hate it.
lucifer: They only speak Latin in Heaven. The first thing they do to you is teach you Latin.
me: Please go on.
lucifer: Then they teach you the magic litany.
me: Magic litany?
lucifer: Praises. God is apparently addicted to Latin praises, and so in Heaven they chant lots of Latin praises.