An Interview With God

Interesting how a blog can induce you to clean up your 'image.' I did just that today, first thing.
 
Got slightly rained-on during my bike ride today. Could have been worse.
 
Poor Bobby Fisher. He now resides in a Japanese jail. Will Bobby Fisher become another Martha Stuart? Could well be. If so that would be a tragedy. In both cases talented people would have fallen afoul of The Law. And although we might sympathize with both individuals we understand that The Law is the ultimate standard by which we make judgements of right and wrong. Nobody is above the law. Not Martha, not Bobby. Right? Wrong. Very wrong. I will explain this assersion in a future post.
 
Third movement of Mozart's piano concerto number 21 sprung into my mind this afternoon for some obscure reason. I am playing it as I write this, looking for a clue. So far no joy.
 
Tonight's special creation - if I can pull it off - will be an interview with God. As you know, God does not talk to me as a matter of policy, and I am perfectly happy with that policy. But today God requested an interview. This request was conveyed through a deniable intermediary whom I will not further describe. I granted the interview out of curiosity. A partial transcript of the interview follows:
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me: High there.
gd: Hello.
me: You wanted to talk.
gd: Yes. I'll get right to the point: I've been getting Letters From the Earth to the effect that you have been dissing me. 
me: That bothers You?
gd: Somewhat. They say you called me an 'Idiot.'
me: That I did.
gd: This is an unfair characterization and I want you to withdraw it.
me: I will on one condition.
gd: Which is?
me: Tell me what Your strategy is for Sudan.
gd: Sudan?
me: Sudan is in Africa.
gd: I knew that.
me: Of course. So what is the strategy.
gd: Where is Africa?
me: Earth.
gd: Ahh.
me: Ten degrees North Lattitude; 30 Degrees East Longitude.
gd: Oh, THAT Africa.
me: Forgive me for mentioning this but You seem distracted.
gd: Quite right. I am a busy God. Very busy.
me: Busy doing what?
gd: Busy listening.
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I won't bore you with the rest of the interview, which went on to describe how seriously overburdened God was with just listening to all those prayers and stuff. You might be interested in the part where God explained how taxing it was to do His other job of... watching. Watching, it seems, is even more onerous than listening because watching involves much more information processing. Near the end of the interview God seemed to wax philosophical. We had just had a little drink together and God was 'in that mood.' Just before wrapping up the interview, God said to me confidentialy, "You know, R..., the Universe is just too big. I could handle it in the beginning but it grew. I thought at first that it would eventually stop growing. I had to revise that idea. Then I thought it would slow down and contract. I had to revise THAT idea. I realized only recently that it is actually speeding up! The Universe is getting out of hand, R..., and I don't quite... haven't quite come up with a new plan."
For the first time I felt empathy for God. I said, "Want some advice?" God replied in the affirmative. "Stop watching," I said. "Only listen." And with that, God disappeared with a poof. End of interview.
I should mention that I did not rule out further interviews.